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392,698 notes

dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

(via ash-and-fire)

124,922 notes

zackisontumblr:

i bet rhinos cant talk because they would make too many jokes about being horny

(via milotlc)

112,499 notes

710642:

well? can he????

(via halvoid)

#fluffs #fluffs
1,268 notes

salutarilyneglected:

sararkaye:

We have this new really young rifle and he’s okay I guess

Holy shit

(via hellllllllla)

#shit #fashion #fashion
104,907 notes

poco-loki:

bitemycolossalmetalass:

soulgems:

sO I WAS AT WORK GETTING PIZZA DOUGH FROM THE FREEZER AND THIS GIANT PIECE OF ICE FALLS ON ME SO I PICK IT UP AND WITHOUT REALIZING IT I WHISPERED “ICE DILDO” OUT LOUD BUT APPARENTLY MY COWORKER HEARD ME BECAUSE THE NEXT THING I KNOW HES ON THE GROUND CRYING FROM LAUGHTER

vaginal frostbite

image

(via prettyrad-prettysad)

#omfg
7,901 notes

Tony Ward 2014-2015 Fall-Winter Couture

(Source: azuritess, via glimmerandglisten)

#fashion
95,551 notes

hellllllllla:

allonsyarielle:

sir-lancelittle:

can we just review how sensual the panera logo is

image

Oh, bread. I shall whisper sweet nothings in your ear

image

For those of you who don’t know, this logo is very symbolic. I worked at Panera for a long time and at our meetings I was told she is called mama bread. “A loaf of bread in every arm” is written on the back of some of our name tags because that is our goal.

Three are 3 waves in her hair and on the bread because of our 3 rules or beliefs we have as a company.

1. Our relationships are based on respect and honesty (No jerks)

2. We form a connection through our authenticity and service (Rule #1)

3. We get the tough stuff done with optimism and mastery (No Shortcuts)

"Bread is our passion, soul, and expertise. We build trust through relationships with our customers and communities. We are an everyday oasis for our customers. We are a guide to discovering the warmth and energy of a lifestyle enhanced by bread."

While most of this is cheesy, this logo goes much deeper than most people think.

"bread is our passion, soul, and expertise."

(Source: ten-million-straws)

184,972 notes

trillow:

[police officer] “sir are you in possession of any illegal drugs”

“sure thing son whatchu need”

(via emilywhut)

182,107 notes

that-crazy-girl-from-wisconsin:

hobbits-elfboots-and-trenchcoats:

221no:

interbvtts:

i love everything about this post

i have never reblogged anything so fast 

THIS IS A GIFT TO THE INTERNET 

(Source: skoomapipe, via hellllllllla)

#jams
357,900 notes

bass-windu:

starkravingdane:

epistemologicalfallacy:

catladyinwaiting:

actual german compound nouns:
Staubsauger (vaccuum cleaner, literally “DUST SUCKER”)
Vorhang (curtain, literally “HANGS IN FRONT”)
Wasserkocher (kettle, literally “WATER BOILER”)

this is why german is the best

This is delightful.

horse tornado. every fucking time

(Source: iraffiruse, via d0nniethec4tcher)